


Second Hand News

by hopesbarnes



Series: Rumors [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, F/M, Flashbacks, Poor Bucky Barnes, Smut, Song Lyrics, Unrequited Love, wise Natasha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-10-28
Packaged: 2021-01-05 12:11:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21208334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hopesbarnes/pseuds/hopesbarnes
Summary: This is part of a series of unrelated one-shots based on songs from Fleetwood Mac's Rumors album. This one is based on the song Second Hand News.Bucky had y/n but let her go, and she’s now in love with Steve. The problem is, Bucky’s still in love with her.





	Second Hand News

**Author's Note:**

> **Bold is song lyrics**, _Italics is flashbacks_.__****

There were few things in this world worse than what Hydra did to him. At the top of the shortlist was watching y/n be in love with Steve. Sure, Bucky had broken up with her. And sure, it was over a year ago. But that didn’t mean that he wasn’t still in love with her. He’d tried many times to let her go, but her absentminded touches, the way she called him James, and the sweet tone she had for him didn’t let him forget her. He didn’t think he’d ever get over her, he’d always be her  **second-hand news** . 

_ It’d been a bad mission. One that left innocent people dead. They weren’t able to get the Chitauri tech either. Just ended up with a death toll and hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of damage. Whenever missions like this happened a part of him retreated and he was left numb. The nightmares came back, and he wasn’t able to take care of himself completely.  _

_ They got back and waiting when he left the quinjet was y/n. She looked depleted, almost as if she had gone on the mission instead. She ran up to him and hugged him tightly, and he couldn’t even manage to hold her back. She just led him to their room. She helped him shower and got into bed. He managed to fall asleep, and she followed shortly after.  _

_ The nightmares crept in as quietly as a stampede. She woke up to his whimpers and tossing, and he was sweating. She tried to lull him from the demons, but he was too far gone and instead reached for her neck with the metal arm. She managed to yell out to Friday for help before blacking out.  _

_ When Bucky came to he was in his room with only Steve. He panicked, and Steve had to hold him down and explain what happened. It was then that Bucky realized he’d never be able to protect her. All he could do was hurt her. So when she woke up he broke up with her. It broke both their hearts but didn’t break any bones and he figured that was good enough. _

He tried to keep the way he felt to himself, no use having the entire team either pity him or despise him. But Natalia always knew, she was a spy after all. 

“You still love her,” She said one day while sparring with him.

“Love who? What are you talking about Talia?” he said unconvincingly. 

“You know who,” She said as she kicked his leg and got him unbalanced. 

“ **There’s nothing to say** ,” Bucky said after she pinned him. 

He decided he was done with sparring for the day and left for the showers after that. But the whole time all he could think of was the way she used to sound beneath him, a sound he’d never hear again. A sound she made now for  _ Steve. _

_ Before things were bad they were good. Oh god were they good. She was the brightest thing in his world and he worshipped the ground she walked on. She was patient and helped him grow. He made her feel loved.  _

_ It didn’t take long after they started dating for them to trust each other entirely. Once they reached that point they were like horny teenagers. Always touching, always laughing, and always trying to be alone. It became a tradition, before every mission they would spend as long as possible memorizing each other’s bodies.  _

_ “I love the way your skin feels,” he said kissing from her collarbone to the top of her left breast. “And, I love your boobs.”  _

_ She giggled at his bluntness, but it turned to a moan as he rolled his tongue and encaptured her nipple in his mouth. She tugged on his hair encouraging him and he locked eyes with her. Using his preoccupied state, she flipped them so she was on top. She ground against him, spurring him on. He growled from the movement and lined them up. She kissed him as he entered her, only breaking the kiss once he was all the way in. She took control and moved to her own accord and he happily let her.  _

_ Nothing was hotter than watching y/n fuck him into oblivion. He would let her take control in the bedroom anytime, any day. He could tell she was getting closer, and he was too. She moved to rub her clit, and he moved her hand away to do it himself. Her moans were filling the room like a symphony. As they both reached their peak he realized this must be what heaven is like. _

A week later, things were the same. He tried to forget her, added another girl to his list of ways to get over her. It worked temporarily, until the next morning after the girl left he ran into y/n in the kitchen. 

“You sounded like you were having fun last night!” she said cheerfully.

“Yeah,” he said dismissively.

“You were always amazing with your tongue.” she laughed while saying.

“Fuck, y/n you can’t say things like that anymore,” he said slamming his fist on the counter. She jumped from the motion. 

“Jesus Buck, I was just joking. What crawled up you this morning,” she said irritated. 

“I’m sorry. It’s just- you can’t joke about that anymore it’s not fair,” he said quietly. She paused for a moment, unsure of what to say. 

“Not fair?” she said raising her voice slightly. “Not fair?” she said louder. “Who the fucking hell are you to say not fair. Not fair is you breaking up with me. Not fair is me being in love with you, and you decide to end it. Not fair is me wanting to marry you, but you didn’t want to be with me anymore,” at this point she had tears falling freely and her voice was cracked. 

“I loved you too, still do! At least I haven’t moved on and forgotten you!” he said shakily. 

“Don’t you dare bring Steve into this!  **I’ve been tossed around enough ** by you, I wanted to be with someone good.” she was getting up at this point. “I can’t be around you anymore.” 

With that, she left the room, and Bucky felt worse than he did before. 

The next few days were torture. At least before he was safe in a bubble of pretending, but now he had to face the music. The compound was filled with bad memories, and people who just reminded him of how bad things were. He felt like he couldn’t breathe.

Another mission came and went Bucky did what was asked, took out another bad guy, got a few bruises (not that they lasted longer than a few hours), and was home again. Things started to feel like an endless cycle. One that didn’t allow him to move on. 

So he decided to leave. No reason for him to stay anymore. He called Shuri and she offered for him to take on his farm again. Even wanted him to help out with the war dogs. It’d be good for him, a place to get away from what once was. 

He handed in his resignation letter, which felt weird considering he was never formally given a job. Most of the people understood he needed to go, Steve pleaded for him to stay. He still didn’t know what happened with y/n. 

“I gotta go Stevie, and I think being back in Wakanda is gonna be good for me,” Bucky told him.

“Are you sure, we could figure something out here Buck.” 

“I’m sure. As sure as you were that your dumbass needed to join the Army.” 

Steve laughed at this. “Okay. But  **one thing I think you should know.** ”

“What?”

“ **I ain’t gonna miss you when you go.** ” 

Now Bucky was laughing. “Punk.”

“Jerk.” 

With that, they hugged. 

Bucky was just about packed and ready when y/n showed up at his door. She looked ethereal as usual. Just looking at her broke his heart.

“You’re uh-really going huh?” she said with a wistful tone.

“Yeah, think it’ll be better for everyone.  **Someone has taken my place** already.”

“I’m gonna miss you. I don’t understand why we ended the way we did, but I did love you at one point.” She said truthfully. “And nobody has taken your place, you will always have a part of me he won't.”

“We couldn’t be together. I would have ruined you, you deserve someone like Steve,  **someone who’s going to give you peace of mind** . Not someone who might tear you apart.”

“You wouldn’t tear me apart,” she said.

“Agree to disagree on this one, doll.” 

“You’re sure about this?”

“Yeah, I’ve  **been down so long** . I need to learn to be up again. Wakanda did that once, hoping it’ll do it again.”

“Okay. If it’s not too hard, can you write to Steve? He worries about you.”

“I will.” 

With that, she left. It would take time but he knew this was the only way he would ever heal. It’d take time, but this was the right move. He was ready for the next chapter. 

**Author's Note:**

> For more frequent posts follow my tumblr! (@rogvewitch)


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